boo.

2011-11-11T23:11:00.002+08:00

THINGS ARE REALLY GOING TO CHANGE (FOR THE WORSE) FROM NOW ON FOR THIS WHOLE YEAR.

PLEASE STAY STRONG BECAUSE YOU KNOW YOU CAN'T.

whoooopppppppp

2011-06-30T23:38:00.001+08:00

LOOKING FORWARD TO AFTER BLOCKS LIFEEEE WITH THE KIDDOS AND THE COOLIOS :D

for now, FMLLLLLL :/

(semi)-MOVED !

2011-06-28T10:51:00.004+08:00

TO THE semi-END OF THESE 1022POSTS OF "sad songs for dirty lovers" FILLED WITH MEMORIES OF ALL SORTS;

damaged_tape

(i'll still be back though, complicated nvm -.-)
ily.

2011-06-25T00:30:00.003+08:00

黑色毛衣

借口

you're beautiful

this love

O: COOLSHITZ !!

there are so many things i won't touch now,
cause fear of remembering is scary.

2011-06-23T23:09:00.000+08:00

only a dream

2011-06-22T21:47:00.005+08:00

It was only a dream...
Only a dream, that I was somehow glad of.
~~(causetheOLDyouarentgoingtoappearanywhereelse)~~

undamaged... really?

CUTIE omg :D

JUNG THIS IS FOR YOU HAHAHHA. #droolplease !

shitty.

2PM - SO HAWT

2011-06-20T18:56:00.006+08:00

you're just so not worth it, not worth a shit of mine.
i seriously find myself sounding stupid previously.

/edit! come to think of it, he is really turning me schizo, i can't stop thinking differently about now and then. it is always about now and then and now and then and now and then, and whatever lies ahead is nothing. nothing that would concern him anymore.
(sigh)
"i'm gonna be okay~ gonna be okay~ i'll be okay~ baby, without you~ without you~" -Without You, 2PM

EVERYONE PUT YOUR HANDS UP !

where's the drive babe.
where is itttttt.
that's the thing you need now, so desperately,
not your heart nor love.

smalllll brain

2011-06-20T11:39:00.006+08:00

my brain capacity is limited,
& im back in say-yes-to-beef mode again!!! :D
(after all that black pepper beef spammage bbqing @ seoul on thu night, thanks people!)
i swear i never felt that bloated in my ENTIRE lifeeeeee,
and so sick of beef. sick of its smell and taste in my mouth. bleagh.
but alot of boarding school jokes that night hehe w jieshin and xinying~ lol & the rest of the night was spent deciphering sick connotations o_o ahemvanahemdaleahemhoekangahemxinying HAHAHA :D

change.
it's still the same.
i need no more reminders 'cause everything's just...
broken.
but, certain nights certain days,
i still do miss the times.

(STUDY AHHHHHHHHHHH damn)
NEED TO DIETTTTTTTTTTTTT >:(

beachhhhhhhhhhhhhh

2011-06-13T19:39:00.003+08:00

LIKE A CUTEEE :D

i need to get shoes, yes shoes that would attract my EYES.

& HAHA total replica of my room nowwwww (sigh)

just scram, okay?
spoils my eyes... peace out baby.
#ICANTWAITTOMEETANGIETMRRRRRRRR whoop.

2011-06-12T19:22:00.003+08:00

能不能回到泪水还会流的时候?

gonna study like some dog already, NO REGRETS.
NEVER \m/

Pain

2011-06-12T13:08:00.005+08:00

I WANT GREENTEA FRAPPE NOWWWW ): ): ):
kbye.

BIEBERLAUTNER SWEETLOVELY

2011-06-11T16:21:00.006+08:00

this one's for you and me,
'cause what goes up must come down.

HAHAHAHA i find him cute d: too bad.

no abs photo or anything, so stop trying to drool!!!

HAHA damnnnnn cute!!! imagine it going "ku-kuuuuu"
anyway ya, i want my nocturnal self to be doing the right things from now on D:

& have been starbucks-ing quite often recently :D
greentea/caramel frappe!!!!! (Y)
gonna try their scone soonnnn, that cheese brulee is too taxing on my pocket :/

k that's all, tata~

backkkkk

2011-06-10T19:42:00.004+08:00

太快，太匆忙，我们都不知道...

哪里来的笑?

mugging date was cool today :D
exposed & knew so many things at the end like wthomg and did quite a bit of work too! omg raspberry white chocolate cheese brulee (Y) & all the stalking & talking (gossiping) was really really funnaye.
great to get to feel this way again~

chinamen not bad ley. HAHAHA proven in the past 4 days ^^

~~like an asshole.~~
disgusting.

2011-06-05T19:30:00.005+08:00

hahaha you never fail to amuse and make me laugh.
just a bit weird now and then (to me) i guess, like...
& when you ruffled my hair at the end,
it reminded me of somebody so so so much.
deepdowninside,iguessistilldo
but, i'm still glad for everything, all the crapping, all the laughing, all the drawings, all the smsing when you're just beside me, all the switching music players thing, all the "ehhhh why so much kpop!!!"...

in any case, omg daughtry's good! i like :D:D

if miracles are gonna happen,
i'll be yours tonight. i'll be.

FOR THE TIME BEING, BYE WORLD!
SEE YOU IN 4 DAYS TIME.

easy come easy go

2011-06-03T16:47:00.008+08:00

"Sometimes I wish I wasn't a girl. Then I'd not cry so much, not feel so much, worry about the smallest shit, wish I was this and hope I'd get that, say No but not mean it, wait for a call, get sad when I don't feel remembered, get jealous easy, think about the future and memories and promises, remember and believe every word I hear, believe in things that are pretty impossible, believe in fairytales, convince myself that dreams come true, want to give all my heart out though it's breaking inside, care too much about stuff I should really ignore, hope and hope and dream and wish and wait and wish and wish and wish."

from a blog.

time to studyyyyyy for that ~~stupid~~ sat on sat.
& f-ing look forward to meeting OldbutYoung (if you can get what i mean aha i doubt so oh well) friends after everything.

last night, digimon just made a tiny difference.
power rangers, ninja turtles, pokemon...
all the bullying and irritating and consoling made me feel good.
bow down to childhood tv memories.

I FEEL SANELY CRAZY NAO \m/

我会努力

2011-06-02T20:59:00.003+08:00

我没有恨你什么

所以才更加难过

最后竟然不是你陪我到最后

那些照片里的笑容

脑海中你的温柔

全都必须遗留在这个路口

这不容易但我会很努力

不让那些回忆在夜里让我哭醒

我知道不容易但我会很努力

拼凑起我的心

一个人继续勇敢地前进

...
(damn gd song)

2011-06-02T19:24:00.008+08:00

if you really cared, you would have talked to me at least once all this while, not being bothered by whether i want to or not.

And,
i realise im not alone,
i'm not the only one with all these shitty problems.
there're so many people facing so many (selection HAHA shit the bio jokes again) pressures just like me,
and i believe i can make a difference to them,
cause i want to.

& my difference would come someday,
at least i believe so.

*smile* tiny shoutout: im back, YES BABY!

anyway cll lesson from 9-3.40 today was no joke really, but had fun during lunch, caught up with hk too yay! & hahaha vantagepoint till 5.45 was funny to the max with daniel, bian, jy and yx! glad i stayed :D stupid "omg 12:00pm again!!!" & linking of xueshan characters to the movie characters lololol.

& to my dearest siu, tsktsk i adjusted my font size just for you! be honoured pls hahaha. sigh dun look as cool as before liao wor HAHA love!

& to you, i hope you're fine k.

不需要说太多

2011-06-01T19:14:00.008+08:00

/edit!
i think i have a liking towards guys with cute bangs HAHA :D:D
& they just kept appearing...
&& omg, 张孝全 (Y) lol stupid videos made me cry and cry -.-
&&& wo you xiang he jiu leeeeeeeeeeee

我真的好想不见掉。

2011-05-29T21:37:00.005+08:00

my eyes hurt,
still. gosh, hate that heavy feeling on my two little eyes. they're gonna get squashed soon D: *gasps*

enough of all those irrational doings & thinkings :D
come to think of it, if there's no death sentence for killing people, you know i would just take a knife and stab people. yes, people.
HAHA so much for the (near-)end of terrorism with the death of the mastermind megaterrorist!

hmm got bored of doing bio, like really.
thought i would find some entertainment using the comp but guess i was wrong !!!
life is getting so mundaneeee i think im drowning with it O:
it's really the start of isolation, i can feel it (so much in my genes and DNA and nucleotide sequences aka molecular data, what about fossils? ok nvm HAHAHA D&E YAY natural selectionnnn~~~)

getting used to having all the negativity surrounding me too: waking up feeling like i havent slept, brushing my teeth dreading the day, doing things/work while feeling shitty, watching tv feeling like whatthehell, sleeping feeling like i lost something. I LOVE YOU NEGATIVITY, COME TO MEEEEEEEEEE. (oh sucks argh)

something random:
SIAN. START of ISOLATION AND NOTHINGNESS.
:D:D i know im good tyvm ^^

(Y) ^^ i stalk stalk back d:

... ...

2011-05-27T20:46:00.005+08:00

HAHAHAHA omg really disappeared after that stupid post (Y)
i'm backkkkkkk ^^ (yesh not focusing on work for now d: YOU STALKER, STALK MY BLOG HAHAHA if you know this is referring to you :D)

today's be-yourself day!!! (how fail, cause alot of people just came in like half-U? jeans isn't that bad afterall :D) AND WOOHOO HOLIDAYS ARE STARTING TMR ^^ *claps*

life has been... idk "hazardous"? (sort of.)
ok more like action-packed, and all the action came from all the remedials, having fun really -.- okay not that muchh, but i guess they're all going to help :D HOPEFULLY! & i like my remedial buddy!! ^^ aka laijm HAHAHA so apt.
& for now, im boredddd so i shall type stupid stuffz :D

HOW TO GET THE MOOD TO GO ON FULL-BLAST MUGGING FOR JUNE HOLS:
-find certain kinds of motivation that would allow u to look forward to ^^
-get some good music to do work with (doesn't work with memorising stuff)
-get the momentum & never stop until your brain is blasted
-just do and do and do...
-don't get sick!
-have a talking buddy(ies) while you're dying under the work 'cause everybody's going through the same thing!
-sleep enough & eat enough!
-reject temptations
-love yourself and work for yourself :D

hmmm let's hope it's a fruitful june hols for everybody!!! ^^

Sometimes, shooting nuclear bombs ain't enough,
just not enough to diminish the mixed feelings inside.
And for now, distance is working out fine,
just not enough to mend the torn ends.
You,
just not enough...

(to stop all the late-night wishing)
(to stop all the dreaming)
(to stop all the disappearing)
(to stop all the bleeding)
(to stop all the reminiscing)
(to stop all the cursing)
(to stop all the screaming)
(to stop all the cuts that're appearing)
(day by day)
(... ...)

不知道还是比知道来得幸福

please stay clear-minded.
fine and okay, don't really exist permanently.

你不见了

2011-05-18T23:48:00.003+08:00

你...，还在吗?

不习惯这种莫名的不存在感，

发生了什么事了吗?

发现自己一直在徘徊...

好像，自己也要不见了一样。

/把爱剪碎了随风吹向大海~

#1001

2011-05-18T19:48:00.005+08:00

好像，真的就沦落成陌生人了。

人与人之间的关系真的好脆弱哦，

比我想象得更容易摧毁，

或许因为这样，我们才活着?

ahaaaaa, have been mia-ing for so longgggg, been trying to be a good girl (LOL) nah, guess i can survive without using the comp too :D
HAD (HALF-PRICE) GREEN TEA FRAPPE TODAYYYYYYY ^^ happy happy! & being the happy & $$$ me, i treated siu to her venti d: just your lucky day, babe :D good talking+studying session today too (heart)

i miss so many things.

maybe i shouldn't have written so much into that piece of thing, sort of revealed too much??? AH regretting :/

WILLPOWER COME TO ME, so that ~~i won't punch people i dislike~~ I WILL STUDYYYYYYYYY ):

#1000

2011-05-12T22:20:00.000+08:00

强颜欢笑

sometimes i really don't understand...
not like it requires anymore understanding.

:D

#999

2011-05-11T18:51:00.005+08:00

VBALL MATCH WAS DAMN (Y) :D:D

AWESOMEZZZZZ IS THE RIGHT WORD!

didn't waste my time afterall hahahaha.
omg & hmm while roaming around after the match with teo, saw an eyecandy HAHAHA (Y) even better~ but koi gave me the wrong orderrrrrr :/ -SADNESS-

omg gonna hit 1000 posts soon, shall not blog anymore crap.
time for math and bioooo, hee bye ^^

只看见你

2011-05-10T21:07:00.004+08:00

starting.. to live for myself,
to learn not to twitch or anything after hearing names,
to learn not to be in my own world comtemplating about so many "what if"s...

to learn not to place that troubled look on my face (:

应该只有在梦里才能再次坦诚的遇见吧。

陌生人，你好。

/omggg do yall know that there's this jap senior high sch in sg!! THEY HAVE DAMN CUTE GUYS THERE HAHAHA, at least from idk how many metres away, there's this damn cute guy who looks like a jap actor TEEHEE :D & recently, i kind of think alot of people are cute HAHAHA, maybe cause they cut their hair or their hair is just cute from the start :D:D:D

just continue brightening up my day~ ^^
TIRED. & i wish our friendship didn't turn out this way cause of anything anyone of us did ): MISS YOUUUUUUUUUU... alot :/ sighz.

u won't see this but...

2011-05-08T20:59:00.003+08:00

thank you for being there these few days, these few weeks...
thank you thank you thank you, really.

thank you for making me feel less alone, less surreal...
& for letting me feel like i'm breathing & i'm living.

/getting down into the water during stj was really... cooling (: such a great feeling - looking @ the moon & the stars in the nightsky while trying to air-dry myself before reaching home. ('cause i didn't bring extra shirt OOPS)

2011-05-06T23:22:00.002+08:00

因为需要勇气，所以我会勇敢。

2011-05-05T21:44:00.003+08:00

the world is crazy~
what about me?

2011-05-04T22:57:00.004+08:00

let's waste time~ chasing cars~

2011-05-04T21:17:00.003+08:00

原来是这么一回事。

不知怎么的，看多了，听多了，知多了，心里的无奈也不停地增加，但还是抱有小小希望。可是... 或许还是自己... 放不下。

留了，却一直想走... 一直一直一直，不断地反复着，就像一个alternating current (O:)

当时只想着: 若走了，却又回不来了...

所以我留了，留了--虽然心里的伤越撑越大，对这世间的人越来越绝望，到最后还是把后悔封起来了。不能否认没哭过，还在大家面前哭了不知多少遍，就这样。没人能说什么。最后就撑着无奈的笑。

这条路是我选的，不会后悔，不会有所遗憾。

至于... "一切都变了，是时候该放下了..."

痛，是无奈的喧嚣。

哭过就好了。

黄城的过去未来因你而精彩!

2011-05-02T20:33:00.005+08:00

黄城结束了，终于还是走到这里。

该写信的都写了，但是心情还是很空。

那些曾有的陪伴我不会忘记，因为你们让一切都值得。

就算在bump-in四天中，悄悄地为乱七八糟的事哭过，但是还是能够因为大家，因为道具而笑出来。

有时没有勇气，就是对自己最大的坦诚。

不会后悔留下来，不会后悔留下来而感到的快乐，悲伤，痛苦...

因为黄城曾经让我得到，也让我懂得现在的失去，不应该再回首过去。

因为昨晚那一刻，应该很难忘记吧~ :D 我们又做到了!

haha will never forget marking stage, striking stage, clearing confetti, failing the first ever popping of the "pooper", singing & listening to jay in daoju room with bihou using van's ipod, listening to random playlists on dale's phone, camwhoring with j2s anywhere everywhere, eating macs & toastbox for breakfast, all the crazy eating and talking we had in dingyi's house, late night talk with liew & kelin (collin) abt small tall fat not fat not thin muscular 180 185 miss S..., all the 'jiayou's & notes & hugs, singing 一首华初的歌 & 最蓝的天空, epic 谢幕s, all the people who came to support ESP SENIORSSS ^^, staying in school & sleeping in lep room, freezing, eating kfc with j2s and... yep all the late nights we spent on doing daoju~

at the end, im glad it all existed.
& for now, im wasting time away :D :D :D i don't want school!

(seriously.. i just came back and you just kept idk talking about studying. can't i just rest for a day?? ARGHHHHHHHHHHH)

2011-04-25T23:53:00.002+08:00

i really wonder if i did things right this time round.

sad to say, maybe not.
sorry to everybody who tried their best to help and i still... yeah.

2011-04-25T22:33:00.004+08:00

总觉得对自己太狠心了，但是不这样做还能怎样??

好没有勇气，连望着你的背影，都会藏在墙后。

still in the midst of trying harder~~
how hard is harder? i think im starting to experience it.

the feeling of emptiness-
not gonna be an easy way out, and when im genuinely fine, maybe... just maybe.

火烧的寂寞~

2011-04-24T21:39:00.002+08:00

我回来了!!!!!

back homeeee, no more talking cock while bathing, no more late night eating (not even called snacking liao la) to grow fat, no more blue tea, no more star~~gazing~~bucks @ 11+pm (green tea frappe!!), no more morning breakfast with teh tarik, no more people to chiong work with, no more tapping of cards, no more hall C, no more waking up @ 6.30 and arriving in sch just in time for assembly, no more no more boarding school life. yep. i will miss my roomies aka xinying & jieshin, and all the chionging back after school just to dump dirty clothes into the washing machine days (:

& now, great to be home :D with all the distractions available hahaha. omg yes lights on when it's gna be 10.30 and omg endless internet~ nothing changes when everything has changed.

idk, i wanna be tougher, i wanna be stronger and at the same time, i don't wanna change anything, i don't wanna lose any bit of it i can still get now, i don't wanna just disappear into vapourrr. (but people are all telling me the otherwise, and i would be fine, really fine.) it'll only work if none of that happened, or will not ever happen again. it'll only work if i can stop finding myself looking from a distance. it'll only work if i can just control and hide somewhere. it's just too easy to crumble the wall i fixed right in front of myself and my heart because some things used to be that important. rebuilding sucks. anyway tolerance level really getting a bit cui this year, no good rah. like what siu tells me all the time "JUST GOT TO TRY HARDER." & just know that i went through so much struggle to make this decision, i hope my mind would stop fluttering and get fixed on something because you're just so... idk. i wish i can be that open-hearted but sorry im not and it's really really really really really hard to settle on this it took too much courage from me, i feel so wrinkled now. & everything (all the smiles all the laughter) just seem to drain away as well...

it's getting too tiring to be strong on the outside.

如果人类没有回忆...

到最后还是这样，我还是选择停下脚步，不再追，不再跑，不再想要一同走下去，因为在另一端已有另一双脚印踏得越来越深，越来越稳，越来越让我觉得我很渺小。这条道路不是三个人能一起走的，所以我选择停留，选择放过自己。

就这样，还会崩溃几次就随着它吧

2011-04-16T22:49:00.003+08:00

hello earthlings.
been so isolated from the world after chionging my shit cll compo out until 1+am on mon D: no comp no anything, just bathe work eat sleep in the boarding sch LOLOL not bad leh so hardworking d: & fun talking cock while bathing haha with my roomiesss~ but damn no lifeeeeee :/

tutoring's getting quite fun omggg srzly, the girls are cool like lishi & liyun they very uh coolz and funnyz!! :D:D:D gossipy also oops hahahah! teaching math doesnt seem that bad eitherrrr~ rushed back for zongcai while meeting with the jam and shitty crazy cat-dog downpourrr D: zong cai 1 just ended, feeling shag like some dog. shinny left home after eating @ macs today~ O: hahaha left with fs and i feeling a bit lonely aw D: & my bt results suckedddd bleh max ):):):):):): GG (incoherence = gp fail hahahaha oh no)

好像是很久以前的事了。

你骗我。

每当微弱的心跳开始微微地颤抖时，好难招架... ...

从来不知道自己有那么脆弱，但是真的就是这样。

不明白为什么................................

这几天, 好像一直接触到和某某有关的"东西", 也开始想到其实在这些背后，应该为了有好多是真的而感到庆幸，但是也因为揭示了许多谎言, 许多眼泪把真正的笑容淹没了，剩下的只是虚伪的自己面对。

自己也变成了什么???? 我讨厌现在的自己。我讨厌让我变成这样的人,事,物。

可以不要掉了吗!!!!!!!! 好烦啊!!!

it's my pms period, oh well, normal hahahaha :D
tmr will be a better day!!! im going home after a week teehee (:

AND OMG ALOT OF WORK DUEEE ON TUE NEXT WEEK FMLLLLL BLEH.
monday's gonna be bad bad day lol BD

I MIGHT JUST GROW TALLER TOO SINCE I DRINK MILK EVERYDAY OMGG cause of the holy cereal snack i eat every night d: FATS & OMGGG NAPFA ON MONDAY LIKE WTSSSS :/ :/ :/ NO TIME AND PLACE TO PRACTISE!!!

2011-04-12T23:41:00.002+08:00

空虚

boarding sch nights are so fun with fenshen and shinnyyy ^^
yay, today's dinner was koko krunch duo with HL milkkk hahaha, omg we really going to turn into shen xian without ordering dinner... i bought chips woohoo and i ate starbucks' cinnamon roll today DAMN NAISE OMGGGG :D:D happy!

& tuition today a bit O_O the place win liao lor, so jialat kind and my teacher has mohawk dyed hairrr??? HAHAHAHA winz, all the best to me D:

oh well, k bs internet's gonna get cut off soon sucks :/
GOODNIGHT PEOPLE ^^

it always seems fine before a thunderstorm.

2011-04-10T22:26:00.003+08:00

& i've been fine for quite some time...

INFECTION IS HEALING !!!!! (AKA RISE OF JY HAHAHA JK)
ALL SET & READY FOR BOARDING SCHOOLLLL ^^ with my 6 packets of medicine + 1 antibiotic creammmmm~
neh with fs & js, cool people in a cool room... life's gonna be crazy for the next 2 weekssss!

/everything seemed so surreal, until...
i felt my breath stop when i saw it appear.
there was an instant sense of detachment but filled with so much familiarity...
i thought i slowly faded away, slowly disappeared but not knowing what to do, i still did it the normal way (the courteous way).

but you very well know that everything's different.

< /3

2011-04-06T22:32:00.004+08:00

:D

:(

daoju doesnt have alot of things to do these few days but i guess we'll have from tmr onwards (: infectionS should be getting better alr other than my finger's D: like pain siaaaaaaaa PAIN ): okay erm today's plaster design was "chip." HAHAHA to relate to daleeeeee the kid with super baggy funny hc pants (HAHAHA), ok super lame but definitely NO MOUSTACHE on my plasterrrr!!!

in any case, many people look downnnnn recently ): ): ):
BE HAPPY ~~(GO LUCKY)~~ !!!
am trying tooooo~

追着, 跑着, 这次我真的累了,

讨厌自己...

2011-04-05T22:57:00.005+08:00

this is the n-th time,
that i lost control in front of people whom i know/ don't know.

woohoo -.-

就这样吧，
就这样吧,
就这样吧,
就这样吧。

不想再知道, 不想再听到...

因为我什么都不是... 也不值得

(daoju's good hee after i returned but my infection sucks max... take damn long to eat one plate of rice and even a fish fillet siah lahhh pain&itch -.- SAD. and im proud of my "HOT!" plaster teehee :D)

laxing baby~~

2011-04-04T16:13:00.002+08:00

laxingggg.

i think i lost it,
really lost it all.

yknow what, srzly hate is becoming such an apt word for everything.

& nobody truely understands.

shitty

2011-04-03T20:31:00.003+08:00

这条路, 一直拖着自己疲惫的身体走着...

走着走着好像真的越来越远了，都不想再追了。

以前, 怎么把分开这一切讲得多好，多无所谓，多不会有所不同，全部都没实现

该有的都没有，只会看到不该有的有

不仅想哭，

也哭了。

-------------------------------------
been feeling like some shit these days, no idea why and dont really wanna know why. stress plus alot of other stuff maybe.

but im glad, i didn't give up on smth that i enjoyed now (cause of the people there) just because of you.

hmmm, some hurt just dont disappear that easily even when one has been moving on. those hurt just turn into some form of a nightmare that haunts (occasionally).

oh well, i really had a nightmare yesterday wthhh D:
it was OUT OF THE WORLD.

in any case i hope infectionS (of all sorts) get out of my lifeee!! >:(
(& i wouldnt saw any part of my fingers anymore -.- twice's enough)

&& woo muscleaches & bruises, somehow it feels good.

#980

2011-03-30T23:38:00.003+08:00

special #980 post just for you~

TODAY MARKS THE LAST DAY OF MY EC JOURNEY!!!!!
feels a bit sad hahahaha, oh man.
AH THEN MY HOLY PENCIL THAT I NEWLY BOUGHT ALSO DK FOR WHAT LIAO :/
ignoring the "mild" break in ec-ing that i had in between cause of some issues (ahem HAHA), yeah it has been about 15 MONTHS = 1 YEAR 3 MONTHS...
like some winnnnn, i know right :D

the days are going to be even more lonely now,
oh wells, thanks for all the (little & minute) strength you've given me through all the emoshitshitshit phase...

& from now on, byebye (to all the videos/photos/pictures/related things)
ALL THE BEST ^^

k end of the crappy post ahah idk what im typing oh well. MICHELLE IM NOT LIKE YOU ANYMORE ): ): ): MEH. HEARTBREAKZ.

& FENSHEN GET WELL SOONNNN OMG YOU SCARY SHIT TODAY ):
and wthhh all the taxis are crazy, people flag like siao they dun wanna stop THINK WE PRANK WOW. hahahah win (Y) and all the buses like stuck somewhere out there, all neh comeeeee. srzly there's something veryveryvery wrong about today :/

TOMORROW WILL BE BETTER!!!

2011-03-29T22:31:00.007+08:00

WHY DOES EVERYBODY KEEP SAYING THAT I LOOK SAD TODAY :/ (even my mum askedddd ._.)

i don't even know if i feel anything hahahah winz.
daoju made me like a cuiiii, k time to go crap out some stuff to submit as workk lala.
k love yall, bye.

2011-03-27T20:20:00.004+08:00

说得容易, 做起来却超难...

全世界我只看见

你的视线你的一切

全世界我只看见

你的伤悲你的雀跃

我会挡住别人对你冰冷的语言

没有说多依赖你
♥ yyl

快点好不好? 我不喜欢熟悉。

BLOCKS ARE OVER TEEHEE

2011-03-26T20:37:00.006+08:00

LIKE A BRAINDEAD

(explain laterrrr~)

in any case, WOOHOO *late exclamation!* BLOCKS ARE OVERRRRRR :D:D:D
chem sucked damn alotttt, nt single digit pls ): ): sighz.
cll... ... ... ... 无言 D:
bio - let's just say it's luck.
math PLEASE BE FINE LIKE ARGHHHHH.
k end of post-blocks review :D

FRIDAY:
went to celebrate siu's bday @ PITSTOP with julian, pinky, matt & me HAHA kor is a tard, reach newton = reaching raffles place mrt worrr -.- ANYWAY it was quite fun, not that dry like i thought it would be :D BANGBANG + guessguess + looklook&grabgrab games were fun :D sry i can only describe cause i dun rmb their names ): ): i think guessguess game damn interesting cause can draw, do charades, describe using letters and bigger/smaller than.. :D and cause kor is a no-brainer who doesnt KNOW almost ALL of his cards on who, where and what Zz ^^ oh yeah, my SAMBAL CHICKEN CHOP WAS GOOD :D

ok, then headed for sch for kaigong ^^
& did black balls (HAHA), white wash, bought tapes and stuff and talked cock :D
ended not that early but niceeeee~ k la nt bad, did retarded stuffz with collinwan on the bus with xinying on hers :D:D

TODAY:
met bihou in sch to complete homeworkkk (YES teachers are evillll, they sms their reps to inform the class to do blahblah tutorial RIGHT AFTER blocks T_T)
hmmm then @ 1130 fenshen came :D! & the 3 of us did bio, while waiting for collindino to come... & we went for lunch @ bugis hahahaha cheese baked rice (Y)
then we got koi & we went ikea to buy daoju stuff :D
and uh, bihou and i went back to sch to place stuff and continue doing work LOL BD with hoekanggg @ his class bench. he is some mega mugger wts ._.

walao bio summary sucks srzly, do for dk how long only halfway through ):
STILL NEED SUMMARISE RFLP RAHHH, srzly argh i want a ctrl-c and v button for my notes ): mehhh. and that explains why IM A BRAINDEAD NOWWWW ^^

:D ^^

and wthhh, msn you suck ALOT REALLY ): bleh

RAINY DAYS

2011-03-22T14:01:00.004+08:00

GIVE ME STRENGTH FOR WED PLSSSSSS ):

i hate it i hate it i dont want it to come ):
rahhh.

for now, math ^^
(bio was part of the pasttttttalr :D)

/it's raining more than ever~

2011-03-19T21:25:00.001+08:00

just go away.
really.

JUST GO AWAY.

SCH 9.30 TO 7 :D

2011-03-18T23:35:00.006+08:00

funny hoekang got me listening to this (on his small mp3 player hahaha, but imba headphonesss O:)!!

:D
i know you're somewhere out there
somewhere far away
i want you back
i want you back~
... ...
oh, am i a fool... who sits alone talking to the moon?
you used to be the sun, now i'm just looking at the moon yooo.

somehow, i like juniors too, just like J2s :D
somehow, somehowwww.
thanks bro for teaching me mathhhh ^^ ahah.
and omg siu for random crashing ♥♥ (increasing my amusement for the whole day) and nonetheless, van&wil for just being there all mindf-ed @ the later parttt HAHAHAHAHA ~~(Y)~~ oops.
HOEKANG YOU ARE DAMN FUNNNYYYYY ^^ winnerz.

&omg chill @ starbucks w/ van was... "AWKWARDDDDDDD?!"
YEAH that is it -.- siannnnz. awkwardz max srzly, oh well!
really like people with PRETTY CHARACTER SIAAAA (: ^^ :D *grins*

dont ask

2011-03-17T23:03:00.005+08:00

/edit @ 2.03am
-insomnia- don't ask me why.

Even stars can't hold me back tonight,
not me, not my tears.
('Cause they're dropping down like what i deem as shooting stars)

"And out of a sudden, i felt that i'm all alone in this. No one really stands by you forever. Maybe a few will stick by you for periods of time, but not all the time. Even your dearest will leave you."

TOTALLY AGREE (Y), but goh, im sorry i never stood by you till the end, really ): GUILTY MAX.

2011-03-17T21:11:00.003+08:00

藏起来

i wish i can be occupied every day, every minute, every second,
so i won't have the time to think about stuffz and i won't think about all those shit things happening now and then and yeahh, soon.

BLOCKS, how much am i working hard for it...
currently 0% of my energy~
not good not good at all...

im just searching for entertainment everyday, so that i wont remember things, wont regret things, wont hate things, wont feel like forsaking everything.

& i wish the day i won't prefer dying would come soon.

2011-03-15T21:51:00.006+08:00

不值得

i realised i've been telling myself "it's k it's k it's k" since the start of this year and i believe im going to continue this trend till the end of the year.

今天走出校门，看到车子往自己开来, 第一次...

第一次好想停下脚步, 就这样给它撞下去...

但我并没有, 只是心想: 为什么他没有撞我...

我真的疯了，被你们搞疯了...

expect the worsttt.
im trying...

I MISS YALLLLLL D:

2011-03-13T19:26:00.003+08:00

GIVE ME STRENGTH PLEASE.

anddd bro ^^ thanks for... today :D

:D:D

>:(

2011-03-13T13:42:00.005+08:00

i think im going crazy (again).
this is damn irritatinggggg.
im stuck & life isn't that wonderful afterall .__.

听到第一个我说做人要诚恳

偏偏第二个我刚刚穿好保护色

第三个我在干什么

静静看着两个我在拔河

... ...

一边笑得痛了一边哭得累了
判若两人~

快要放弃了快要虚脱了
下一个我又是什么角色~

一边温驯爱著一边激烈恨著
心能有几颗~

我痛得快死了可却还能活着
你说该如何

... ...

一边加速冲了一边却在煞车
判若两人~

我不是我的属于别人了
所以自己都没资格选择~

一边极度快乐一边心如刀割
人格分裂著~

... ...

(hehe typed out all the parts i like :D:D:D pro manz i know thanks)

GOT TO FIX MY MIND ON BLOCKKKS ._.
not gonna ruin myself, somehow or another !%@$!$@$ ^^

MEHHHH

2011-03-12T23:48:00.003+08:00

don't like this part of myselfffff~
shooshoo go away~ ):
dont EVER wanna lose control againnnn :/
so paiseh and malu (in front of everybody) and out of the worlddddd, siah lahh D:
-----------------------------------

okay had lianpai today! :D
process was okay? ^^ just a bit boring for j2s aw~
spike stage funnnnn :D:D
HAHHAH omg circle, line, dot, triangle relationships within daoju ftww :D daoju j2s damn imaginative!! including wad sai benzene ring + hydroxyl grp = partial double bond character, conjugation & sex piluss, omg siao liao. yay good talking periods!! :D:D

hmm, accompanied the daozhangs back to kahkeehall to meet laizhihaooo~ and uh, we decided to go kap to lepaklepak HEE ^^ went there, sat down, inspected people (COLLIN'S BROTHER HAHAHA), talked cock... ate :D epic part came when liejun started telling us all his amusing stories again (Y) funny max, we were like a bunch of kiddos laughing like siao there o_o

CAMWHORING SESSION WAS HAHAH epic muchh. aaron & liejun kept zhamming mugshots of collin (the joke) xD then soon, we started exploring liejun's cam apps :D cool sia the effects~ and that's how all the retarded camwhoring started ^^ liejun camwhore was the bestt, his poses were imba jokerrrr-standard lolol! FUN STUFF, never laughed so much within like ~2h for damnnn long alr :D:D YEYYYYY happy kiddo again at the end of day :D after all the shitty feelings~ (:

LOL i just finished some write-original-chi-phrases marathon on facebook with bihouuu o_o siah lah, no inspiration seriously damn hard to squeeze out anything oops :D and i realised songs give me damn ALOT of inspiration :DD hmm oh yeah! talked about how zai jaychou was with his old classicsss too! :D MY BRAINS ARE SUPERBLY FRIED NOW, but sense of achievement ftww~!! ^^ yey.

a few of those we had:

一个人的海在沉寂中，却波涛汹涌。

海般的沉默淹没了我想对你说的一切。

用微笑伪装说不出口的痛。

会期待，是因为无法忘怀。

:D GOOD STUFF YEYYYY~

不能再堕落下去，不能够再在意...
看不下去，我又不行了。

为什么会变成这样

START OF BLOCKKKSSS

2011-03-12T00:32:00.004+08:00

TODAY MARKS THE START OF BLOCK TEST ONE FOR J2 STUDENTS IN HCJC.
WE HAD GP PAPER ... ... (it was ohwell, O-V-E-RRRRRR)
CONCURRENTLY RIGHT AFTER OUR GRUELLING 2.5H OF BIO ICS TUTORIAL, THERE WAS NEWS ABOUT THE 8.9 EARTHQUAKE THAT HAPPENED IN JAPAN. ): jiayouu people everywhere~ ):
AND TODAY IS THE ONE AND ONLY DAY FOR BAIYUNGANG @ NYJCCCC (which i missed D: sad)

in any case, all i can rmb was feeling all so damn tired after the freaking long bio tut after gp blocks :/ but the tutorial was good luh (y) yep sort offf hehe, somewhat revision~

yeahh then went for kaigong and stuff. TODAY, SHINNY, FS AND I WORE YELLOW (coincidentally) LOLOL zai and tycoooo muchhh ^^ and yeshhh woohoo excused from all the cll extra stuff yay :D & got to paint some syf stand thing, wahhh miss painting like siaooo seriously, love that feeling :D im a happy kiddo~ :D:D then hmm, went for fullrun, watch&half-notwatching cause dun feel like.. hmm then taught dale the kindergarten kiddo xiemu song and stuff, IM A GOOD TEACHERRRR (Y) srsly manz hahahaha ok kidding xD

then... j2s went kahkeehall to mark stage~ got familiarrr feelllll :D:D and lol the way there was retarded srsly, random running and avoiding people = funnnn!! im childish, awww so saddd. ANYWAY yep didnt take too long i guess, the ppl inside playing badminton are... o_o LOL ok nvm. DAOJU SHIRT DESIGN DAMN NICEEE ^^ (Y)

uhh, then chionged off and uh REVELATIONS TIMEEEE o_o cua saiiii for a while~ SAW LL THERE OHMYGOD HOLYMAMA GG-FIED ._. mehh. hmmm, then chionged to rush to interchange cause dun wanna miss my LAST BUS back homee man, LUCKY I CAUGHT IT YAYYYYY and i reached home on the dot like 00:00 siahhh lahhh~ ._.

& YALUN CRAZE NAOOOOOOOOOO~~ (Y) :D:D:D
心能有几颗~ 判若两人~~~~~~

THANKS TEO FOR GRABBING MY NYAA CERTTT loveeee ^^

能不能赶快接受我的爱~

2011-03-10T18:27:00.002+08:00

HAHAHA the song damnnnnn catchy~ woohh~ ^^
(accidentally became weak again todayy, TJY no moreeee this kinda thing!!!)

anyway, went bugis street today with FELLOW SHINNYYYY :D:D damn long never one-on-one date liao worrr, and freaking stupid, waited for 170 for so longgg finally one came AND IT JUST ZOOOMMMMMMMED PAST... wtf seriously -.- we were devastated till we took 852 to ATTEMPT to catch it ._. FAIL LA of course, it went different course somemoreee.. *ahemshinnyahem*

FINALLY we reached ~~pseudo-malaysia~~ BUGISSSS & we were feeling damn suayz already! haha and i wished for good stuff to happen :D:D:D ok childish and brainless, sorry luh -.- OOOHHHHH i got caramel milk tea again :D with 芋圆 HEAVENLYYYY~ ^^ but i prefer biting on pearls though O: i mean more used to hehe. and shinny had milk tea with grassjelly! damn funny, the grassjelly endless one using the straw to suckk O:

hmm while drinking&biting, looked @ the cute bag i wanna buy!!! OHMAN REALLY CUTE SIA, but not as much as it was when i first saw it AW! shinny told me it's called the bugis-street-bag walaoooo :/ but nvm i still like it hehe! green was like the best last time then now it's like ... sianz cause of the lousy prints on it ): settled with PURPLEEE (must be teo's influence zohmygodwts) after dkhowmanyfreakingmins/hourspent !^%$!$#@%! on getting purple/red -.- no regrets yooo, but the shop auntie and jieshin were like REDREDRED, rooting for singapore sia :D:D okay kidding ._. GOT MY BAG AND JIESHIN HAHAHAHA got hers.. joke sia, after her $5 bag then this other TOTALLY-HER bag appeared today :D:D

EH REMEMBER TO RETURN ME $$$ LOL no moolahhh liao O:
then we walked around looking at tees and stuff, I WANNA BUYYY ): okay then went around looking for her wallet shopp but can't find and we saw KAWAIIII SHOESSS :D or rather flats~ ^^ walao damn happy siaa.

kk end of shopping trip hahaha teehee! :D
got my bag, happily went home via mrttt.

HERE I AMZ, GP BLOCKS ^^ pls dun kill me tmrrr.
k off to study~ *vooommmm*

YANYALUNNNNNN ^^ love.
anyway end of dream high = boring weekends ): ): saddd! I MISS SAMDONG & TAECCC
---------------------------------

雨都停了这片天灰什麽呢

我还记得你说我们要快乐

深夜里的脚步声总是刺耳

害怕寂寞就让狂欢的城市陪我关灯

只是哪怕周围再多人感觉还是一个人

每当我笑了心却狠狠的哭着

LG

2011-03-09T01:04:00.003+08:00

edit@11:26pm
HAHAHAHA omg seriously finally some GOOD day of my lifee~
took spastic daoju photos & videos hahahah!! :D block of wood ftw, damn cuteee sia xD CAN'T WAIT TO POST IT UPPPP HEHE.
&&& ABs FTWWW SERIOUSLY :D:D great friends, great company, great juniorsss.. i can't believe we can seriously be like thatttt OO: THIS IS TOO MUCH FOR ME TO TAKE YOOO ^^ but naiseee~ can't wait for march holssss woohoo. (okay need study -.- omg siao liaooo, mannzzz) lucky i didnt go home straight lalala~ :D

i sound too high (tonight) sorry maxxx. BUT THAT'S GOOD RIGHT HEHE.
and omg, kept seeing you todayyyyy~ ^^ HAPPYHAPPYHAPPY! :D

pick it up pick it up pick it up~
never say never~
HAHAHAHAHAHA (Y) and HELLO BLOCKS!!! welcome welcome, im gonna ~~slaughter~~ get slaughtered majorly by gp on friday ._. BUT YEAHHH mugmugmug, that's what im gonna be.. BD cool siol.

last but not least,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY PINKYYYYYYY ^^ !!!

-------------------------------------
thanks... BIRDIEEE :D:D:D
im glad we're back to normal, somehowwww.
but, under probation period hahahah ^^

2011-03-08T19:32:00.004+08:00

休息，只是为了走更长远的路。(:

hmm.. i was like playing "cough" hero or smth yesterday.
COUGH COMBO STREAKKKK seriously -.-
scared quite a lot of people hahaha, then shienyang kept telling me to go home -.- and aaron's medicine section in his bag was damn funny. drank some random cough syrup o_o ate this freaking taste like feng1 you2 gummy lozenge from sy and strepsils from bro :D n felt much better i guess ^^

left daoju early and went to see the doc, and im feeling so so so so so much better already ^^

BACK TO SCHOOL TOMORROW~~ :D:D:D
first time i ever ~~attempted~~ mugged so hard for some math class test -.- but the results aren't showing woohoo -cheers-
(and wtfreak, nobody wanna go bugis street with me yetttt.. or rather i only asked jieshinnn oops, she is one busy LITTLE womannn sigh)
and!!! i want panweiboooo's new album O: he's soooo cute hehe.

容忍的人其实并不笨
只是宁可对自己残忍

不能放任所以放了
这点痛我还能忍

CALL ME LAZYYYYY

2011-03-06T19:54:00.005+08:00

can't lead this kind of life no moreeee.
im a pig who sleeps her weekends away ):

ANYWAY amongst my manymanymany dreams i made over the weekends (explains the frequency of me napping/sleeping over the 2 days -.-), there is this damn dumb one!

i dreamt that my front lower jaw tooth dropped, and it turned a bit jelly-like. somehow the first thing that went past my mind was PUT IT BACK WITHIN 3 MINS AND IT'LL STILL STAY!! (noob, muchh. i have no brains in dreams -.-) okay then i attempted placing it in quicklyyy, fixing some jelly parts back and WAHLAH IT'S DONE. but i realised i placed it the wrong way round so i panicked. i took it out and OMG it hardened already. tried to force it in, it did go in but it "collapsed" right after.

in the end, i woke up to find out that my stupid tooth is still there ^^V

kk wtffff, what kind of dream is this ._.
& my mum went to ask my cousin why my eyes looked weird in the morning... my cousin actl said i must have cried. then my mum kept asking me and dk what, WTFFF screwed up -.-

oh yeaaaa, wtf stupid viruses that mutate should all die i tell you. WALAO i recovered from my sexy-gross voice and cough like for maybe a couple of days, i got infected by a NEW strand of virus... whoever made it mutate, you should just keep those virus cells within yourself SCREW IT. now im sick again, rather MORE SICK THAN BEFORE ): flu's gone but was having it for quite a few days, sucks much. and my cough is backkkkk >:( -ANGST- screw lifeeeeee.

CHUKOU FTW~~~ :D:D:D
can you come soon?
too many similarities, too many just too many, they're making it hurt.

PS: CAN SOMEONE JIO ME GO BUGIS STREETTTT PLSSSSS. i saw this damn cute bagggg that i likeee and wanttttt ^^ ^^ ^^

2011-03-06T00:03:00.003+08:00

OKAY IM GOING TO BURY MYSELF UNDER MY BLANKET NAOOOO.
EHHH OR SOOONNNNN.

(if you get what that means, you're imba smartttt ^^)

life aint fabulous, but it's worth living for.. now.

2011-03-05T22:55:00.001+08:00

More often than not, what brings people together, breaks people in the end.

BACKKKK ^^
FRIDAY: (i can't rmb much oops)
ermmm, ohoh! KEPT SLEEPING WTS, IN LECTURE IN TUTORIALS EVERYTHING ): disappointed and sad with myselffff lol. ok aside from sleeping, tried studying for cll the night before (fail, next day cant rmb a thing), during zhangls's lesson (fail, kept sleeping), during break (fail, went canteen to see hehe), during long break (fail, cause test still forget stuff D:) so basically, the test sucked cause it was like O_O what-is-that-word/phrase throughout. mehhh.

besides that i was freaking out from collection of gsc results.
sucks max to have yr teacher tell yr classmate that all of us didnt do well right before the release yoooo. but still, i am contented with my grade, really :D sorry luh, very easily contented cause i didnt do that well normally :/

THANK YOU EVERYBODY WHO TRIED TO MAKE ME FEEL BETTER!!! teo, michelle, jiamin, wandong, gao, wm, didi, jung, zm, kliven, and judo friend (for the letterrrr!!) ^^ thank you linlaoshi^2 :D:D:D

after fullrun, did some daoju thingies and went to crash dramafeste with daoju ppl!! sadded didnt get to watch athena's, but HAHAHA i gt to watch aressss :D the ending was stunning i swear and the set was OHMY WOOLALA~~ :D amazing and amusing (:

saturday:
seriously, woke up late :/ cause my mum forgot to wake meeee.
haha but i reached on time :D met collin and fenshen to go get daoju thingies!
(and i got my balloons too!!)
went courts, ikea, bugis and bras basahhhh. wanted to go lavender but it was postponed. IKEA WAS FUNNNNN ^^ & ate nice lunch and i had woaitaimei's caramel milk teaaa!! NAISE TTM~~ :D ok at least i like it d:

aw, then sweet fenshen went back to beauty world to get receipt with me. BLUR MEEEE, no receipt how to collect $ hurrrr.
and the uncle was nice (288 balloons in my bag currently), and we were stressing ourselves about As and stuff like mugging omggg siahh lahhh, TOTALLY TOO FAST PLEASEEEE. siao liao. 171 is... zz sucks. waited damn long @ newton before we got to beauty world. THANKS ALOT (LOVE ^^)

I WANNA GET WATCHES YOOHOOOOOOO~~ :D:D:D

原来最不勇敢的人... 是我。

你不会知道，也不会了解。

!!!

2011-03-03T00:03:00.003+08:00

MUGGING PLAN AND ENTHUSIASM FAIL MAXXXX ): ): ):
howhowhow, this is getting really bad.
feeling more than tired when it's not even near the end yet...

last night's dream was (Y) AWESOMEEEEEEE~~
"i thank the person who has been there for me..."
ohhhhh yeahhhh~ whatever, it's a DREAM ahem tsk.
anyway you still so cute today ^^

SIAN OF LIFE.
i feel like im living on my own lalala.
goodluck to me tomorrow, cause i've just decided to leave all the mugging stuff and shitz till tmr, which is the last chance to mug ):
SADDED, come on~
something good's gonna come soon righttt?!

'cause i've been living in shit since i don't know when. MEH.

'cause nobody wants to be the last one there...
'cause nobody wants to do it on their own,
'cause everyone wants to know that they're not alone.
-addictive- (Y)

MUMMY IT'S OVERRRR~~

2011-03-01T23:41:00.003+08:00

yes mummy, it's really over WOOHOO.
END OF INDEPENDENCE PHASEEE!!!
didn't wanna blog today, but oh well, it's worth commemorating yeahhh.
end of my journey as my bro's NICE NANNY :D:D:D

anyway, great time after school with jiamin, michelle and mingweiiii~ ^^ you all are really epic-nice-to-talk-to people, at least i had fun listening most of the time :D:D:D had BANANA MOCHA (HAHAHAH WEIRD MAX) but i think it tastes not bad, since im a i-like-choc-banana person!! yep revealed alot of things omg scaryyy, and HAD REDRUBY TODAY IM A HAPPY GIRLLLL ^^ (it's no longer in sequence alr nvmmm...) not much time to spend like this anymoree ): MUG PEOPLE, MUG. but still, thanks for adding on to my memories~ ^^

miss the times when there were only j2s during daoju~~~
really wanna do some work :/ although juniors are funnnnn :DD
IM A PEOPLE PERSON WHEEEE, but it's hard sometimes to be one D:
and yes, zhiyi boon and yining came back today!!! not bad worr, and i got free "egg" sushi (Y) ^^ YAYYY. and liejun is ttly addicted with "ec" wts, he's gonna use it for quite long i guess, FUNNY JOKEEEE.

okay, no negative thoughts no negative feelings no anything. honestly, i really really really wanna believe again... so please come now tyvm HEHE.
you so cuteee :DD

2011-02-28T22:32:00.002+08:00

小风说:"原来只是耿耿于怀。"

或许, 我也是...

adapted: 我就是那有点疯的人

2011-02-27T23:33:00.003+08:00

我也没有你当初说的那么重要。
就算我过得不好...;

有點瘋的人性格很奇怪,有時候超愛說話,有時候可以一天不說話的時候,會拼命的說話,不高興的時候,一句話也不說；

有點瘋的人不愛記仇,但誰對他好誰對他不好,他還是記得很清楚的；

有點瘋的人把真實的自己藏於半夜的寂靜和午夜明朗的笑聲中；

有點瘋的人最注重的就是安全感.希望被保護,卻常常是一個人；

有點瘋的人不容易愛上一個人，但一旦愛上便很難自拔。一旦受傷，總是被傷的很深。只有幾個貼心朋友；

有點瘋的人喜歡海,喜歡顧影自憐.喜歡自己舔傷口；

有點瘋的人性格很古怪而又孤僻,他們會突然在大笑中沉默,感覺悲傷；

有點瘋的人心裡想什麼從來不說.別人也猜不到；

有點瘋的人嘴上說不在乎、心裡卻早已悲涼、心裡的那把火早已熄滅；

有點瘋的人選擇了沉默、不再像以前那樣摯熱的去追求某樣東西；

有點瘋的人總是很愛回憶、回憶以前的點點滴滴、以前的大小事只是默默的想著；

有點瘋的人天生敏銳，與生具備的第六感，對人的內心有超乎尋常的洞察力，但他會把這些東西放在心裡；

有點瘋的人可以把你的眼神、內心看得很清楚，卻不會告訴你，他用旁觀的態度判定虛偽；

有點瘋的人本能的排斥虛偽和做作的人；

有點瘋的人只對真正懂他的人，展示他的創造性，他的情緒。他變得冷淡就證明他開始對你重新審視，當他越是沉默，就代表他越是生氣；

有點瘋的人可能看起來很兇，其實內心是最柔軟的；

有點瘋的人看起來很冷淡，但那只是保護自己的方法；

有點瘋的人很重視友情，但被傷害後絕對不再友善；

有點瘋的人很容易被感動，但感動中又保有理智；

有點瘋的人可能看起來很堅強，其實是最脆弱的；

有點瘋的人可能很愛哭，但他的哭並不代表認輸；

有點瘋的人懦弱，受了傷之後，只知道躲在無人的地方獨自哭泣；

有點瘋的人虛偽，明明已經心痛到無法呼吸，還要在最愛的他面前假裝堅強；不輕易讓任何人走進他自己獨自的世界；

有點瘋的人的笑容，無論開心或者悲傷，他都是一臉笑容，笑容，是他們偽裝自己最好的武器；

有點瘋的人的眼淚，從不輕易讓人看見，她的淚，從來只有他知道，

只是，誰又知道，在有點腦殘的人笑臉背後，埋藏的是深深的悲傷，笑的越開心，傷的越深；

有點瘋的人愚蠢，不懂的怎麼挽回深愛的人的心，只能自己心中默默的祝福和祈禱。

受了傷的有點瘋的人，只會在角落獨自忍受錐心的痛。

有點瘋的人的：體貼第一名，愛吃第一名，愛家第一名，孝順第一名，多愁善感第一名。

^^

2011-02-26T21:03:00.002+08:00

I don't know what i want...
I don't know if anything from now on would work out or not...

I just know I want my mum back -.-

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUMMY ^^
(you won't see this, but ohman run faster and come back soon!!)

4 DAYS OF INDEPENDENCE!!!

2011-02-25T23:39:00.003+08:00

TOMORROW MARKS THE START OF THIS PROJECT.
The project that is going to make jiayuin here turn into an imba housewife (wtfreak i don't even wanna be an imba housewife, oh wellll~)
Anyway! back to the topic: my parents went overseas to runn hohoho.
SO IM ALONE WITH MY CUTE BRO AT HOME = I NEED TO TAKE CARE OF HIM... WELL.

yeah the schedule goes:
Saturday- buy lunch for bro, pack table for his tuition, WASH CLOTHES (!!! his plus mine T_T) go grandma's house eat/slack, take bus back homeeee.

Sunday- send bro for tuition, mug @ that area somewhere, settle dinner somehow
Monday&Tuesday- wake up @ HOLY 5.40AM to go to school (if i don't appear hahaha most probably i didn't hear my alarm then~ OOPS)

oh sian, sad life for four daysss~
BUT HAHAHAHA SENSE OF FREEDOM :D:D:D

anyway stayed back in school today to do work & POP!!
omg i did gp until i wanna faint seriously, mind and brains fried totally... then ehh, amusing sightS in the library yoooo~ changed my perceptions of people and things lalala! (ANYWAY WTFREAK SCREWED I FORGOT TO TAKE THE LIST DOWN FROM LEP ROOM OH MANNNN) okay ermm then do do do until it was close to 6 and went for dinner with kt and jm :D THAI NOODLE HOUSE AGAIN HAHAHA aw sad michelle ):

met hanloong for POP!!!! and both of us are dressed in red, PERFECT :D:D
dances all damn cool, spotted damn alot of people like JUDOFRIEND WHEE, proud of cute junior class (Y) and yep ATHENA WONNNNNNN~! (: great job manz. aiya juniors wont read this, but AH DON'T BE SADDD.
after that wanted to crash mass dance, but hanloong and i last min felt damn spastic so we decided not to. THEN CAME MICHELLETHENOOB!! i suggested to her to go down and crash and we went again with filled up courage, but AH fail againnn hahaha! ended up standing doing nothing ._.

WHEN ARES REDANCED, LOL found teo and whee we went to crash the danceeee. damn funny, michelle ttly zao-ed cause she dun wanna lose faceee. LUCKY I WATCHED FAC DANCE VID THE NIGHT BEFORE, if not totally clueless. danced with hanloong damn spastic BUT FUNNNN (Y)(Y)(Y) reminds me about last year when our class was damn enthu :D:D:D and then uh, joined ccf to go eat with the junior class ^^ (knew more stuff and D: oh man!)

OKAY THAT'S THE END OF MY PARTIAL-CRAZY JOURNEYYYY~ x)
tomorrow = wash clothes day, i sad ):
time to dream high~ BYEEEEEE.

DOCTOR PANGSEH MEEEEEE

2011-02-23T19:40:00.002+08:00

You truely disgust me.
There's no turning back now.

Hmm, not like I know you that well either~

------------------------------------------------
wah sian, doctor pangseh me go out eat dinner -.-
in the end i didn't get to see him ):
HATEZ MY COUGHZ!!!! >:(
my dad actually said (direct quote) "你会咳一百天~"
WAH I ALMOST FAINTED OMG.

anyway stayed in school to do bio tut (which is extended and due on NEXT FRIDAY WTS, oh well do early better than nothing yo. ON TO ALCOHOLSSS NAONAONAO) yeah then watched fac dance here and there, until it started to rain WTSOMGSIAOLIAOOOO. it was crazy and it was time to accompany shinny to take her spastic mugshot d: THEN WENT HOME WITH HER AND DIDI :D interesting (but sick) stuff didi shared on the bus~~ almost died laughing hahaha oops.

early day today :D (Y) happy~
BUT somehow, i miss daoju-ing~ D:
THERE'S KAIGONG TOMORROW YAYYAYYAY for j2s~ woohoo.

SPASTIC SONG BUT I LIKE (Y) THE CHORUS DAMN NAISEEEE~

2011-02-22T21:24:00.002+08:00

今天心情很好。 :D

maybe it's due to the cadbury milk choc that i ate (idk how many pieces DD:) before kaigong xD from shienyang lalala~ HAHA not supposed to eat but i still ate, aww. ENDORPHINS FTW :DDD anyway i rmb the lame joke i cracked on collin and cq about the endorphins OOPSY.

daoju ended imba earlyyy today~~~ (so proud of ourselves HAHAH ok or rather we had nothing much to do either since alot of stuff are unconfirmed D:)
MADE ALOT OF NEW JUNIOR FRIENDSSSSS :D:D:D:D:D (Y)

planned for dinner~ waited for people~
AND WE WENT THERE TO TALK COCK (Y)
and i think i was constantly talking about lame stuff :X
too joker already and now im feeling a bit tired along with my brain cells :DD

the end, time to work.
there's no kaigong tmr OOO: weirdly nice.

2011-02-21T22:04:00.005+08:00

:D

j1s came todayyy!! :D
they seem quite nice, at least the group i took whee :DD
they seem quite enthu on the whole, and i had fun explaining what daoju does and other huangcheng details to them~ (: hopefully they do stay! (got cute guy lolol oops)

okay 君子之交 essay sucks D:
and zomg, the lep orientation thing a bit weird :/
and zomg, need to settle doing work and the proposal ASAPPPP!!
crazy pombeebee yo~

一個人臉上太多的笑是因為心裡有太多的痛

2011-02-20T17:11:00.004+08:00

http://loveis.love2funnyshare.com/view/4d4eb30d3e4b0

:D good stuff!

他們總是那樣，前一秒還傷心的流著淚，後一秒出現在朋友面前

的時候，已經滿臉溢著燦爛的笑容。有人說他們是向日葵，是的

他們在意的人就像是太陽，在面對太陽時永遠是明艷的花瓣，

而太陽照不到的背面，那悲傷藏得那麼好，不願被看見。

只有面對最信賴的人時，才會卸下盔甲，委屈的流下眼淚。

哭過之後，笑笑得擦乾眼淚，說，沒關係，我可以做的很好的。

而面對自己的問題，他們卻茫然無措，面對自己的悲傷，

他們只會躲在人們看不見的角落裡慢慢由傷口越裂越大。

mehhh, no mood to start on gp journal and cll compo :/

ALOTOFWORK

2011-02-19T21:31:00.003+08:00

我们不应该沉默

好像没有了 ^^
但是也好像... 真的有一点... 那么一点那样。
D:

fenshen damn random!! "flying like a g6~" HAHAHA (Y) i like.

LI-LI-LIKE A G6

2011-02-18T22:23:00.003+08:00

YOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOO~
ok important point: I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M LISTENING TO "LIKE A G66666~" NAOOOO OHMYGOD WHATTHEFREAK. anyway it was played outside lt5 while we were having (the damn) cll test, lol then i was like O_O wtsss. then there's the "f... you" joke song that chuxi and i can recognise cause during pw times, ts showed it to us LOL THEN WE WERE LIKE GRINNING TO EACH OTHER during the test hehehe xD joke muchhh.

hmmm okay yesterday ended on a really bad note and today morning started on a VERYVERYVERY imba bad note too :/ siannnn, go school no mood study, emo shit, so gl and paisehhh D: i think michelle and didi got traumatised HAHAHA OOPS. im still damn joke ok, no fearrrr xD anyway, didi was damn sweeeeeet :D and he's so cute LOL and he gave me a hug (: I AM PROUD OF YOU, REALLY :DD

anyway screw life that's all i wanna say but still, I SURVIVED TODAY!!! IM A SURVIVOR HAHAHAHAH okay oops. i think not bad le luh, considering i only started studying for the test like officially today, yes today ._. forgot some stuff felt quite sian, but oh well, i did my best (Y) WHEE TGIF YOOO. (stupid jieshin, SLEEPSLEEPSLEEP WHOLE DAY SHIOK LA!)

gp test was... okay, chill max. cll test was like: *see question* spam answers before they leak out of my leaky brain. *hears like a g6* OHMYGOD in my brain and continue but hard to focus. *hears nothing on you~ by jaebum!* started mouthing the lyrics while writing, zz distracted while pia-ing *f... you by some man* wanna laugh, looked over at chuxi, both of us GRIN like siaoooo :DD joke la then linls went out to tell them to soften their music and stuff, damn joke. but my leaky brain leaked quite some stuff out ): SAD DIAOOOOOO.

then went for the ending of hc j1 orientation?! JOKEE MAXX. vanessa (Y), great to see her againnnn!! :D anyway, zhaming paint on people quite fun, but wearing school u with paint all around is not funnnn DD: thanks bian for your uniform!! (: took daoju photo and went to eat dinner woohoo, no kaigong saddd. yesterday kai until damn late la keep marking stage like some dog, but the company was funnyyy ;D then stuff at home = gl max, nvm. both sides of my hipbone got or-cheh :/ SIAN today's one damn painnnnnn, still aching like some dog.

dinner @ subway~ damn alot of jokes like liejun and his dad's convos and wad aaron and kok leong's parmesan -idk what shit- thingy and CARNIVOROUS PLANTS LOLOL BEST (Y) i still got one more subway cookie at homeeeeee. dun wanna eat or talk liao la, my voice damn guailan now ):

ANYWAY OHMYGOD I DON'T WANT. :/
sjp.
alot of work to do over the weekends wor, no slack time liao. but hahaha! actions speak louder than words but my actions are minute i guess OOPS xD

SIAHHH LAHHHHHHHHHHHH

2011-02-16T22:58:00.002+08:00

._.
o_o
O:
@_@
O_O
D:

sian.
confusion.
weird.
gg.
guailan.
damn.

friday got test.
AND I ATE BRILLIANT TAUSARPIAHS TODAYYY WOOHOO!
(and im killing my voice, sucks max)

daoju ended damn early today and we slacked around, talk cock, sing songs :D hmmm then started the smsing juniors thing, LOL IT'S A BIG JOKE. "li-li-li-li-likeee a G66666666666~" "-.- okay, see you tmr. *SPAM 40 -.- back to that junior*" + spamming liejun lololol!

my bicycle skills suck, actually i know that -.- im a freaking hazardous biker BLEHHH SAD DIAO.

CRAZY TALKKKK

2011-02-14T22:47:00.003+08:00

SIAH LAHHHHH.
like mrs toh said, i really don't wanna be scarred FOR LIFE.
TIME TO REALLY GET DOWN TO WORK AND WORK HARDDDDDDDD!!

she's damn nice to talk to, i like (Y)

AND OMG IM IN SOME DEEP SHITTTT GG TTM :/
walls, wts biggest joke from liejun D:

2011-02-13T02:17:00.001+08:00

i regret.
bye.

莫名的沉默

2011-02-12T21:35:00.003+08:00

10/2
lalala lessons were boring, bio lab was o_O conjugation, bacteria, sex pilus, f factor... blahblahblah.

went early to amphi and kaigong-ed early too! transferring of wood was like some strength test or ants-spotting or investigating blood look alike juice thing.. hee fun stuff, junior class was damn near that area too. ALONG WITH ATHENA WHITE BAG BOY WHEEEE (i know his name, but ahem public platform ahem hahaha) the day before saw him during war games alsooo, damn cute being piggybacked around :DD anyway (not the pointtt), did damn alot of sawing that day, im gonna grow my arm muscles back alreadyyy WOOHOO. then, went to eat dinner with junior class, they're funny people omg. ESP WEIJIEEEEE HAHAHA he's a joke although he likes to laugh at me (now freakkk), and he can take all the buses with me yay.

11/2
HAHAHA attended lessons and cui max ttly whee, esp during biolecture D: tried damn hard to keep awake but can't, then damn scared kena caught somemore. my lecture notes are in a terrible state now sigh :/ ILLEGIBLE HANDWRITING GRAHHH. chiong bio prac wts, i think my answers are crap ohwell.

then kaigong again wheee :D wts i realised something, always kaigong ~10mins, i start sweating already. my sweat glands seriously imba, always make me sweat damn alot siannnn D: did alot of (crazy) measuring of wood and a bit of sawing again YAY im addicted to sawing already, grow muscles grow muscles. time to change skin color too LOLOLOL. anyway ended early yesterday to go crash campfireeee. in the end, one group play mono deal and the other group attempted to talk about intellectual stuff from cll and h3 proteomics (LOL!!!) epic fail and we started listening to eng and chi songs lolol plus alot of cock.

lala went just in time for all the mass stuff to occur in the central plaza~ damn funny lol we were random highing :D we started the choo-choo train trend in central plaza HAHAHAHA, i think we were crazy o_o anyway the rest of the time was spent singing songs together (at some point in time, it was scary) and uh slacking back at amphiiiii~ LOL met dr hon, mr heng and mrs toh at amphi, funny sight. my bangs was damn cuiiiii damn :/ and we took spastic photos :DD wanted to find the junior class later on, but in the whole crowd hard yooo D: yep then went home feeling uncui HEHEHE. saw weijie and joelle at the interchange LOL and he was laughing at me again -.-

BTW MY ANGEL IS A JOKEEE i got a ~~spastic~~ cutee (i insist LOL) post-it note from (i guess i know who) him :DD

12/2
woke up at 10+ feeling imba cui LOL and i went to stone in front of the tv watching not bad kbs drama! (called uh single daddy falls in love or smth LOL the plot is damn retarded but chim xD ok gonna watch the drama someday hehe)

yeah then stonestone more, eat a bit of breakfast, change and took parents' car to find misss teooooooooooooo :D ate thai noodle house OOPS as in the food there not the shop -.- and we went to college to do work?! while waiting for mr nghanloong. in the end teo slept for the whole thing UNGLAMLY on the class bench and i did a bit of work before resting too :X FINALLY HANLOONG CAME WITH THE ICE FOR OUR DRINK YAYYY :D ohohoh yeaa, we wanted to buy ribena but we ended up buying raspberry 7-up 1.5litres to drink LOLOL CAUSE CHEAP YOOO damn joke :X

went to meet mr klivennnn and ts, and the stupid 1.5litres bottle was lugged around too. choose stuff, buy stuff, ate this damn filling indo food (nice stuff!), went daiso shopshop, eat icecream, chill @ macs, talk cock and mrt-ed home :DD BEST PART WAS I MET LEECHEW THE SIAO GUIIII @ PLAZA SINGGG ^^

DREAMHIGH IS DAMN GOODDDDD (Y) getting more interesting. jinguk's life is damn sadddd ): i dont like seeing taec like that sigh, BUT OMG HE KISSED LALALA. and samdong's getting worse already :/ he should remain pure seriously bleh.

embarking on something new~
things come and go.. LIEWWW JIAYOUJIAYOU K :D love youuu~ really enjoy your company :DD there are always people who are there to screw up your life cause it's for you to prove that you're better than them (:

2011-02-09T23:56:00.001+08:00

damn cute hahaha :D
THANKS JUNG AND KOR, WHEE! (lovelove)

2011-02-08T23:29:00.006+08:00

地球倒转，我也疯了。

只是希望，但做不到。

今天第一天开工，不错不错。开始没有东西做，渐渐就有东西做。helped bihou clear the paint mess (and both of us looked like we've got some skin disease, cause the paint cannot washh offf!! why they so "zai" go buy such imbaa paint. he looks like he got gloves on OOPS), saw wood (YAY nice), drill+hammer nails... destroy platforms...

not bad luh, quite okay, but quite tired rahhhh.
made new friend, and uh got to talk to old friends too... :D
makan 炒饭 woohoo and uh sambal kangkong LOL, okay yep dinner was quite funny i guess. jieshinn should stop singing emo songs!! ok la my immunity damn high thanks thanks :DD

k screw chem, bye.

(oh yesyes omg chuxi and i caught L playing with pens with the mouth during chem lecture LOL like wad we used to do but we can't do the motion way L was doing it walao siann can shift up down oneeee, nt fairrr)

2011-02-07T22:22:00.006+08:00

我忘了，忘了为什么眼泪还会流。

whee swim test not bad (y) no swimming module!
lessons were boring, at the end of the day i was damn angst (right michelle and gaooo LOL) and uh had a nice chat with teo and chooniiiii~ miss our mugging days yo.

went to meet daoju peeps hahaha, okay la then gao came to find me and we htht again LOL in b108 naiseee~ oh then it was the general meeting thing, listenlisten so attentively (i damn guai thanks haha!) and daoju people left early to go makan dinner!!

MACS HAHAHAHA joke sia.
after eating until i wanna die, did a bit of chem (which i gave up, gonna copy heck sian diao damn confusing) boyboy's damn good in math and chem omg, he tried teaching me then i still get wrong ans for the salt hydrolysis part. gonna die for the perf task shit on wed SIANNNN, i dont want ): okay then look at people play monopoly deal until so funny, and alot of cock.. jieshin was dying with complex numbers, she was more of like complicating things than solving the question ahha!! collinwan is damn mean with paedo laizhihaoooo rahh. im gonna spam poke him tmr tsk blehh.

the end, then daddy took bus home with me (:

K NEED DO WORK BYE.

2011-02-06T00:06:00.005+08:00

mehh life's good. sort of.

not much mood for cny, like take angbaos for the sake of taking, going out for the sake of visiting... etc. nehnehneh, nothing much to look forward to.

went to mingwei's house today, whee SQMS NY DALT GOT ALOT OF PEOPLE (quite alot, more than i've expected) YESYES and their standard not bad. mw and i went to da3 ba4 HAHAHA omg familiar feel whee i like :D then makan alot of tidbits omg with teo michelle jiamin shikai mabel maria and mw's sis, sinfulll all my fats coming back~~~ D:

then went to find classmates (: dinner was fine, movie was omg i guess we were all tired already hahaha, i wasn't laughing at any bits anymore -.- then went macs to talk a bit of crap whee :D not bad not bad~ and hb is good entertainment, seriously (y) puts my mind off things haha!

lovelove yall :D

i just can't. 凡事都要靠自己。

2011-02-03T02:02:00.002+08:00

HAPPY CNY!!! :D

listened to it using wandong's itouch that day during break before linlaoshi's lesson, wts he's too good. i cried hahahah :D

LALALA

2011-02-01T22:39:00.006+08:00

醉酒并不消愁。

只是...头好重。

不一样了。

我应该是(心里)醉了。i think im quite shaggg lolol :X

那感觉好恶心。

thanks gao! daniel! siu! hong, pooh and pinky for accompanying :D

回到...
还要多久...

2011-01-31T23:33:00.003+08:00

平静的海怎么又波涛汹涌?

原来就算有承诺，现实还是会诋毁一切。

quote:

"当时我还不明白为什么这样的两个人不会走到最后，可是现在，也许我懂了。这样的感情是最纯的，没有任何的物质及社会性。可是慢慢的我们都被世俗侵袭着，都在面对各式各样的诱惑。

当身边的这个人熟悉到已经没有新鲜感觉的时候，这份感情会变得如此的脆弱。

感情败给了时间，我们败给了现实。曾经的相濡以沫，曾经的海誓山盟一时之间竟也变得陌生而遥不可及。

时间终究会带走一切，最后的最后，当我们都找到了自己的归属，那个人只能是我们记忆中那个模糊得支离破碎的剪影。

曾经的美好，如今的陌生，未来的淡然。也许这就是我们留给那个自己生命中最深爱的人的全部。那些海誓山盟的永远也许就是没有相交没有终点。

请深爱你身边的人，请忘记你最爱的人。"

MONDAY BLACK

2011-01-31T19:56:00.004+08:00

no more monday blues seriously. MONDAY BLACKKKKK ):

in the morning, went to school chiong chem planning, such a nice and lovely, rainy monday morning, until michelle decided to migrate to talk to mw. ZOMG LAAAA I GOT BOMBED BY ALL THE HYPOTHESES!!! praypray pls dun be trueeeee, plsplspls. ): i don't wanna be a joke that people laugh at :/ SIANNNNNNNNZ. now so awkward liaoooooz :/ teo still tell me to be natural, hard yooooo. anyway, whatever im the lucky soul who has autographhhh!! (aiya die downnn liao, heck)

yeah, mood totally destroyed in the morning T_T
then was pe, did the beep-beep test hahaha it's not as cute as i make it sound like paiseh. quite lame, in the end left people in our class only that havent do, damn paiseh wtssss LOL and jiamin's face was damn epic when she knew that O: after beep-beep, damn guai continued on my -unfinished- aq LOLOLOL. sjpppp, all the while never learn correct kind of thing oops. ENLIGHTENMENT FOR ME AND GP MACHI HAHAHAHAH :D

math was slightly crazy, cause gao was forever grinning at mrs toh (AHAHAHA RIGHT, that's her "normal face"~) LOL joke ttm, math was like nothing much, i think we didn't pay much attention too. ZOMG that applies for lecture as well, we were like talking about cgs etcetcetc :DD

chem was a bit dead, and wooooo, i know how to do buffer qns! normal qns just go away, seriously. AND THEN we went xinwang to eat hahaha, mad rush i tell you (FOR NOTHING RAH) and jiamin burnt her tongue whee, all teo's fault. michelle is a PANGSEHKIA!!! i hope she sees this muahahaha evil laugh.

bio was fine? just copying for both sets of paper a bit sian, but i hope you can read my handwriting eh gaoooooo :DD OMG SAW TEO'S um.. EC BEFORE GOING TO SALT, DAMN CUTE OMGOMGOMGOMG HAHAHAH :D nice one seriously (y)

just a while ago, i was brainwashed by pokemon characters, their names and their photos. I LIKE ~~PIGLUP~~ PIPLUP :DD so cute, that penguin ahah! k no more random stuff nyehhh~

:D 笑容没了，距离有了，快乐也走了~

好久没有的平静。真的。

2011-01-30T23:36:00.004+08:00

tell me how come in other parts of the world, hot and cute guys can exist. what happened to most people here D:

MARIO MAURER ♥♥♥♥
(i don't care if he's a thai or his name sounds funny to any of you, cause he's a half-german! CUTE max i tell you :D and he's only like 22!!! no snatching pls tyvm, if not you die. unless you're a gay like huang who ecs him ahah! the movie almost made me cry gasps. anyway i INTENTIONALLY posted a spastic photo thanks :D)

DREAM HIGH ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
(HAHAHA im crazy, ten hearts first time appearing on my blog lol! wooyoung+taec woohoo! cool max cool maxxxxx !!! and i like IU's voice :D she is imba yay. suzy is damn chio and cute.)

hmmm, nothing else.
if any of you got any time on hand or doesn't feel like mugging or doing any work, you can visit this site :D http://blog.renren.com/share/350185800/4872880472
talks about very... OKAY JUST GO READ YEAH. those who don't know chinese, too bad. i think it's quite sad, but harshly true :D gt lots of nice phrases. (thanks to liqi indirectly :DD)

talking about that, this freaking j1 actually told me "i don't know how to read chinese" when i was giving her the huangcheng form, WTF dunno chinese and yknow those are chinese words?! (screww, damn AP)

THAT'S ALL FOR TODAY.
TOMORROW WILL BE BETTER!! (when i daoed my gp homework?! i doubt so D: nvmm hehe hopefully i see L with nice hair again yay!)

一生中最怕差距，变化和距离。

IT'S (ANOTHER) END OF THE WEEK!!!

2011-01-28T22:02:00.005+08:00

honestly, doesn't feel like. i keep thinking there's school tmr ): sad. lol and yesterday i was thinking it was friday the whole day, crappy brains i tell you. today was like full of ups and downs woohoo (:

school was nothing much la, just hoping to get by everyday.
alot of work ): D: ): D: ): D: ): D:
today L looked me straight in the eye o_o O: nt bad nt bad~
and lessons were.. okay. SPAMMED WITH CHEM HOMEWORK AGAIN, SAD DIAOOO.
damn alot of things to do ):

green hornettt ahahah damn funny! :DD but quite sick -.- oops.
i want the squishy sushiiiiiiiiiii!! (everybody hinthint hahahaha jkjk!)
met chuxi and daniel on the bus after that, cooliozx! provided entertainment for me~ :D tyty, nice scrabble game photo and nice horny story :DD

teo said seeing me having typed stuff in chinese makes her feel that im still sad D: but chinese is damn cool o_o it's like another form of expression i love to use when i need to LOL ok lame nvm. but still... (hehe!)

咬紧牙根，忍着，一路都忍着... 我觉得我的牙根好强哦 :D

在度过的每一天中，如果有一些人不了解你，有一些人觉得你很烂，有一些人连直视你都不想，那该怎么继续呢? 我怎么觉得接下来的日子会很难过 ):

那我为什么还那么固执，那么执著，那么坚持? 我也不知道，应该是疯了，想把自己推进火坑里。

不是我的错，却变成我的错。我是笨蛋，行了吧。

或许不是你，或许不是我，或许不是他。

2011-01-27T21:43:00.003+08:00

我只能说世界很复杂，人类更复杂。

随便你，真的。

我会不会开始... 好怪哦! O:

jiayou to jung, kor, mr huang and didi! :D

(i wonder if you even have time to read this!) sorry to let you misunderstand! i wasn't pissed or anything. I STILL LOVE YOU K :DD

lookingforwardtonexttue!

2011-01-26T19:39:00.004+08:00

:D he should sing more and rap less!! -bravo-

我告诉自己...就这样。不要为无谓的事，无谓的人再浪费自己的心跳。it's ok it's ok it's ok it's ok it's ok you'll be fine.

gao, please be fine, love you!
(& S's hair is quite nice today lololol)

of course

2011-01-24T18:19:00.003+08:00

(btw, you make me feel like im the sinner... ._. when im not.)

i don't like this idea.
i just don't understand how this can occur when it's like that.
whatever lah. im not exclusive anyway.

screw my brains (in my nose HAHAHA jung~)

(:

2011-01-23T01:50:00.003+08:00

if you can't stand it, im "sorry" cause i can't help it too. \m/
maybe i should start learning how to cry as and when i want (i mean sad lol), even not considering that people would be worried about me, maybe just maybe. let's just be selfish and self-centred.

anyway, im sick of trying, i don't have to say im not the one who's trampling on people since i don't expect any sorrys in return, but i find myself always trying to think for others, and all the crapshit. my principles suck i know.

HBL~~~

2011-01-22T15:52:00.002+08:00

或许就是因为没醉过，所以一直想醉一下，彻底的。

不是我疯了，而是好想把这当借口，释放自己内心最深处的所有感觉。

或许在这之后，会好过一些。

真的，“没醉过的不了解”。

渐渐的，也没话说了。

WHAT'S WRONG

2011-01-21T22:14:00.004+08:00

school is screwed. people are screwed. i am screwed too.

it's damn sian, trying to complete everything on time & people bo chup, whatever lah. really don't know what to say.

felt quite sian after talking to angie and chuxi about certain stuff. it's like.. idk there's nothing to look forward to anymore, and i feel so insignificant, just like them. maybe it was the wrong choice i made at that time that led me to losing so many things now. it's so irritating knowing everything had to turn out this way and this is no nightmare. it is such a joke that i wanted to lead this kinda life while i was still in sec 4, and it is a bigger joke that it's this dumb huge thing that made me lose everything i used to have and turn into who i am now. there is seriously something wrong... somewhere. guilt & responsibility vs (what angie named as) interpersonal relationships...

*i haven't checked if i can even login to any wikispaces/moodle for hbl -.- if i can't, then goodluck, gg ttm*

也许全世界我都可以忘记/

life sucks la. screw.
nobody's gonna be there anymore, so just get on with life, even if it's hard.
like what hb said, life is meaningless~ lalala.

2011-01-20T23:30:00.000+08:00

为什么这样!

缺席

2011-01-20T19:53:00.009+08:00

mmhmm, after today's 海洋文学 talk, it made me feel like there's still so much to experience and venture in my entire life. so why get stuck when im only 17 ._. sigh school is still school i guess, something that takes up almost my entire life now.

AMBITION/DREAM/WTV: WRITE A BOOK.
but my 表达 so suckyyyy, need time to reconsider lol! lalala~
好想真正地去感受。

剩下的所有遗憾，已经不重要的承诺，那瞬间通通悬挂在脑里。

现在哪里都不属于，哪里都不想去。

或许在某种程度上，我们已不一样。

/走到陆地的边缘, 不是结束, 而是另一种开始。这是海洋文学。

2011-01-18T19:59:00.002+08:00

lalala~ teo got me looking thru qiuhan's whole album of cool tumblr stuff. she loves them cause they're like so true for her as in some :D

k im terribly sick ):
and i don't wanna know why. sigh life sucks.
with a stucked-up nose, occasional headache and manly voice -.-
baaaaahhhh, screwed up.
thanks gao and daniel for idk accompanying :D and walking me out! whee.

got to get down to work~
(anyway today was like some idk day, kept seeing S but no feel wts -.- change ct benches - yes/no? fineeee im neutral hahaha)

SICKKK

2011-01-17T19:59:00.003+08:00

wts, so fast?!
sorethroat-nosestuck-flu-pain-slightfever-sian-voiceless... ):
and the list goes on~ screw it baby~ MUST BE MY KARMAAAAAA BLEH D:

teo is so gonna kill me ):
so sorry worzzz, i just... HAHAHA meh.

today was damn screwed up.
i was screwed up, people were screwed up, the world was screwed up for an instant.. Zz. SIGH okay but im happy about my weight :BB WOOHOO!! no lunch = good plan (Y) i can seriously reach 45 soon i tiaoo youuuu xD hmm BUT IM NOT ANO TYVM. okkk then math lecture, screw the integrations needed for DE ): and all the crap that happened grahh.

hmm then, during math tutorial, found out that REV PACKAGE DUE NEXT MON HOHOHO :D lovin' lifeeeee~ but shan't slack for too long d: supposed to pia like some dog tonight and chiong home directly to nap one hour first -.- aiya then embarked on mass slacking plan with teo and jiaminnnnn. ate island creamery~ TOO SWEET BAHHHH, and went to find nice planners @ northpoint. wtsss dun have -.- wasted trip nvm, but talked alot of cock along the way~ plus missing the mrt stop zz totally zai (y) THEY SO FUNNY :D:D:D

K I DON'T WANNA BE A SCREWED UP KID ANYMOREEEE.
screw life. bye.
imma gonna go try rapping (HAHAHA~)

breakthedawn (infinite's) is not badddd whee.
semi-tvxq is damn cool la, HAHA keep your head down wts :D

2011-01-16T12:06:00.004+08:00

FENSHEN TIME TO EAT KFC & TALK CRAP?? :D
we can do work too.
surprisingly, i read your blog and i miss you tons now. all the crap we used to talk and do hahaha.

BUY PAINT, MIX PAINT FOR PLATFORMS, PAINT PHOENIX, GOING CRAZY OVER GRADIENTS, HAPPY FOR AMOEBA ACCEPTING THE COLOURS... all so good~

anyway our udders date how arh?! disappear into thin air leeeee D:

/i only truely understand now. im just escaping everything by finding people to keep myself occupied. mehhhh. phobiaaa. 我已经无法明白。

以前，说的不是这种以后

2011-01-15T21:33:00.005+08:00

以前，要的(也不是)这种以后...

最近，一只跟自己说我好了，也不去乱想什么。

好像很有用，我也好像因为越少接触，也开始忘记那是什么感觉了。有时，在人潮中还是会偷看一下，哈哈哈白痴。

只是有时还是酸酸的，好笨哦。

分开对你来说是一种解脱，而我还在试着让自己完全地解脱。

我很高兴我那么勇敢，哈哈哈。

或许我真的不会爱... (不要爱了!)

开始注意其他事情应该也会对自己好。

:D good songs are good for the soul~
i miss myself~~~

GAO GET WELL SOON!!! :D

2011-01-14T19:59:00.005+08:00

HEHEHE i hope you see the title of the post yo, miss gao!
you scared me last night worrr, heard your voice and i was like O_O!
get well soon, i wanna hear your epic laughter (LOVEEEE)

wl people like to scare me on the phone wor.
miss goh is another one .__.
zomg seriously speaking (i know you'll read this too.) i felt so heartbroken not because i got reminded of my own stuff, but 'cause of how much you're suffering and i can really hear it in your voice. i feel so sad that i can't help you when im getting along (quite) fine nowwww. AH IM SUCH A FAILURE ): im sorry.

after the crazy 2h and 38mins phonecall last night actually i mean this morning till 2++am, i woke up feeling so horrible and gross haha! crap and there was bio review test blahblahblah didn't finish mugging all topics and tried to revise a bit in the morning, epic fail D: but the paper was alright i guess? except the last page wtffff. ANDANDAND bio syllabus' gonna be crazy (woohoo) how exciting manzzzz!!

then next big thing, cll test. it was i mean, when i saw the paper such a small thing (oops) finished within 10-12mins? and i left d: WOOHOO nice feeling (y) and daniel was funny cause he didn't study and he was asking to copy mine when i was sitting below himmmm D: and he started laughing (in despair) when i submitted mine LOL. nice one manz (y)

going home is what i dread everyday, seriously.
i feelllll so... alone -.-

neh sidetrack! after mrs toh's talk yesterday about her o levels results' pain and stuff, idk i just felt so much more determined to get everything out of my head, i felt so different already. i don't wanna continue screwing up my life just because my feelings are screwed up. but things are always said too early hahahaha. (shit, i just remembered im supposed to ask michelle about her.... hehhhh) yknow i guess i need to verify again, cause i don't think i feel that way anymore but im not sure (LOL cause i still react to some stuff -.-). it may be just the memories that are killing, so... somebody wanna change brain with me?! :D :D

time to... ~~work~~ TGIF SLACK YO! :D
(today's drinking date failedddd oops)

OH YES today's zhanglaoshi's lesson she said smth..
最远的距离，是我在你身边，你却不知道我爱你。 (Y)

and i found smth similar too :D
最痛的距離,是你不在身边卻在我的心里。

great jobbb hahah :DDD
i decided not to make things difficult for myself either, if it really ends up that way in the future, let's just accept it yeah. anything is possible~